Friday, February 15, 2008
My New Blog!
Go visit Erica is Rich, my new blog. :)
Monday, December 03, 2007
Time to Close Shop
I have spent the last one and a half years writing on this blog and I will spend the rest of my years not doing so.
This weekend, I have finally decided that it was time to close shop and to stop updating this blog. My reasons were not many but they were compelling. This blog ties me down to a past that I no longer want to live in. I want not only to move on but to grow up.
This weekend I felt that I have become a different person. Yet, people around me choose to see me as the person I once was. While that person is someone I love and understand, I would rather leave that person behind now and move on with a vengeance and much love.
I am a lone soldier. While there are people who care for and love me, people will never ever fully understand me. To be able to get me, one needs to step into my shoes -- a pair that is worn out yet durable and timeless. At a young age, I was already questioning my existence. I have always been different and have always thought in terms that were a bit more advanced for my peers and sometimes even for the times. I went through so much emotional lashes that no one has had the privilege on hearing the full story. I have also received so much blessings which I believe has kept me alive until now. And those blessings, I have also failed to mention or share.
Then again, that is the point of my finally putting a period in this long experience. I have chosen to share snippets of me and kept a big part of who I am. Yet, I have given so much about myself that I feel that some people have put me in imaginary boxes with boundaries that are impenetrable.
I have been happy to have shared a year and a half of my life with you. It has been my privilege that some of you found enjoyment in my musings and reflections. However, I need to grow up. I want to move on. I want to be me.
It is closing time. It has been a pleasure. Thank you for being with me.
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If you want to keep in touch, please email me through erica.cleofe@gmail.com. May God bless each and everyone of you.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Political Unrest in Manila
What is happening now? My country is currently chaotic. Watch this as a hotel in Manila was sieged by rebel soldiers and the opposition.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Naughty or Nice?
Since I now live in the place where Santa is actually from, I have been thinking if I have been naughty or nice this year. Well, not that my opinion matters when they make up the list in the North Pole but at least I can present my case to the great bearded one and finally cajole him to give me a really cute puppy.
Therefore, the great debate is is this: Has Erica been naughty or nice this year? Since I am really an honest person, I can (with much humor) admit that I have been more naughty than nice. If I were to write my autobiography, I would definitely make an entire chapter of 2007. It is the year when I found myself, made peace with aspects of my life that I cannot change and looked forward to a life ahead. However, since those three were profound realizations, the depth of my wisdom came with much suffering, anguish and teeth-grinding nights. I complained. I was angry. I was sad. I pushed people away. I was dramatic. I was selfish. I was miserable. I was self-deprecating. I was not the person I should have been. I was different.
No matter how sympathetic Santa might be, if his categories of being naughty or nice has not changed throughout the years, then I will definitely in the naughty category.
So this year, I will have to settle with no puppy from Santa but at least I can say I grew wiser this year. 2007 made me naughty and wise. I think that still calls for celebration.
To Santa, please make sure you prepare the million euro transfer to my bank account for the end of 2008. You will definitely put me on the list next year. :)
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Facing Facebook
There are a million sites where people can connect to old acquaintances, school mates, club mates, etc. Apparently, there is an ultimate site called Facebook. Almost everyone I know in Finland has an account. I have been invited several times to join it. Until now though, I have opted not to register.
It is not that I am a snob or that I feel that the connections I have made through the years are not worth keeping. However, I have realized during the past few months that I am a bit tired of keeping superficial connections with people in general. I am not saying that there is no chance that I will become great friends with people I met once or twice. I am just saying that at this point in my life, I find it more important to concentrate my energy on a few people and build my relationship with them. I am sure I am missing out on a lot by not signing on to these online friendship platforms but it is a decision I need to live with for a while. As a great believer in fate and good luck, I am confident that I would not miss out on great people by not being "online."
Anyway, I have this blog. I hope this is enough for now. :)
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Death and Birth
Today is the 14th death anniversary of my mom and tomorrow is my dad´s birthday. Life cannot be more extreme than that. ;)
To Mama, thank you for the great 12 years. To Papa, thank you for the last 26 years. I wish you the best of health and peace of mind.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Freezing and Boiling in A Day
As I sat in my 10-minute 100-degree sauna bath today, I realized that five years ago, I was sitting in a sauna in Manila with a sign warning me that I should: (a) Move out of the sauna after five minutes and (b) The temperature should never be above 40 degrees. According to the sign, I will die if I fail to comply. Okay, maybe they said I will have a heart failure not exactly die. However, I am still alive and last time I checked I still have a pulse. Was the sign just a hoax or are Finnish people weird or maybe Finns have superpowers? I would vote for the sign being a hoax because a nation of 5-million people which have survived the ironically comforting sauna could not be wrong.
I think what makes a Sauna good is because for those few minutes, your blood is literally at boiling point AND you know what they say about repressed anger (that it kills you at some point, haha). So sauna provides a way to release that negative emotion.
Okay, maybe my theory is off-the-mark. In any case, sauna is good especially when it is almost 0 degrees (the freezing point) outside. Imagine that, being boiled and frozen the very same day! All I can say is that this is part of the joy of being in Finland. :)
