Thursday, September 27, 2007
No Medal?
I won a lot of things in my life -- spelling bees, quiz bees, elections, writing contests, raffle contests, group singing contests, cheerleading competitions -- and yet I really hardly remember that I won these things.
I am just surprised that I actually have forgotten a contest when I was 11 and it has been buried in my memory for quite some time now. But I know that at that time, it was the most important thing to me and now, poof, it´s nothing!
Maybe it is because these victories are not the ones that help define who I am. Though it is great to win some things, what matters essentially are experiences where victory was defined by one´s self. For me, victory happens when I learn to trust a person again after a long time of mistrust, regaining a lost friendship, helping others, being joyful inspite of... ;)
This morning, I feel like a winner. I feel like that because last night, I learned to open up again. I learned to be honest with a friend once again. I am a winner because I am a work in progress and so far, I think the result will eventually be one hell of a person. :) Hahaha! :) Just kidding. Well I am sure I will be a better person in any case.
Hmm, I wonder what kind of personal reward system I should have? :)
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